Today Wasn't a Good Day

Last updated: February 2020

You know how you wake up somedays and you can just feel it's not going to be a good day. As if something in the wind is telling you so? I woke up and I felt like this. I tried to shake it off, but for some reason, the feeling just stayed with me. It was loyal.

Small things added up to a bad day

I began getting dressed when I noticed my outfit had basically been attacked by baby-juice AKA my slobbery niece. I tried to do my hair, but every product I needed was missing *thanks sissy!* And as the day continued, it honestly continued on like this. Small things continued to make my day that much worse until very tiny issues became bigger ones, until the day just kind of went to crap.

Of course, with everything else going wrong, why wouldn't my body do the same? After all, I am autoimmune, aren't I? I continued to get one headache after another until I questioned what was wrong with my body that I was constantly in pain... And what was wrong with my life that everything had to go wrong, all in one day?

Bad days with Crohn's are different

At times it does get me down that I can't have a "normal" bad day, like a healthy person. Where, sure, things are bad, but "at least I have my health." That's a phrase I've never been able to just throw around. At times I wish the definition of my bad day was a bad hair day or maybe a stomach ache, but a normal one, that goes away with a Ginger Ale or something. Not like what I've been forced to experience. Not like bad days with Crohn's disease.

I've been trying to remind myself that no matter how bad a day I'm having, life is all about perspective. A huge thing that's helped me to maintain a (somewhat) decent perspective, is my past. My condition has its ups and downs now, but in the past, it was more like: lows and lower. Although those times were extremely hard to move past, I try to take myself to that place: that cold, lonely, isolated, depressed, hopeless place, whenever I find myself in the midst of a pity (or bitter) party.

Small things that make me feel better

Small things make bad days better too! Small things like trips to my local (mom-and-pop) ice cream parlor help too. Maybe sitting in the bath, having a self-care day [or even] hour works wonders!

The other day, I was so tired, but was in such a desperate need of a pick-me-up, that I threw a face mask on, in bed, with a deep conditioning treatment in my hair. Things like that are so small, but as someone battling a chronic condition, mean so much. That time we take for ourselves is important and like it or not, the bad days do serve as an undeniable reminder of that.

I don't have all of the answers. I actually have very close to none, but I will say, the next time you're having a bad day... Take time to breathe and make time for yourself.

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