Don't Let Crohn's Ruin Fun Times with Your Kids

In addition to being a Crohn’s patient and a mom, I am also a Health Coach who works with other Crohn’s patients and moms. So, the topic often arises about what they can do when they are trying to plan something fun with their children but are afraid of getting sick.

I have had a mom feel terrible about canceling the family’s day trip to NYC due to her not feeling well because of her Crohn’s symptoms, another who was worried about taking her kids to the park in the middle of a flare should she have to use the bathroom and another whose child missed school because she couldn’t drive him without getting sick on the way there.

These are just a few examples of ways moms with Crohn’s worry about the impact their disease has on enjoying fun activities with their little ones, but with some planning, you can avoid common obstacles that may come in your way.

Ask for help from another adult

Make your fun day with your kids a family affair by having your spouse or parents come along.  Should you have an urgency to use the bathroom, you know that the kids will be chaperoned without missing out on the activities. Also, by having another adult with you, you can relax a bit more which will help calm the nerves that can upset your otherwise calm stomach. (It is a vicious cycle!)

Scope out the bathrooms as soon as you get to your destination

I always feel more comfortable knowing where the restrooms are as soon as I get to my destination so that I am not running in circles looking for the closest ladies room should I need it quickly. Use this as an excuse to have your kids use the bathroom before your dinner/show/concert/tour begins so that there are no interruptions while having fun (at least for them).

Choose accesible locations when you go out

If you know that you will need a bathroom and prefer it to be accessible, clean, private, and not a 10-minute walk away, choose destinations that are accommodating. Avoid parks, shopping malls, guided tours at museums, concerts, or the zoo. And, if you will be the only adult, I suggest avoiding movie theaters so that you do not have to make your children miss part of the movie because you have to use the bathroom.

Keep plans as a surprise

Sometimes it is best to not let your kids know of plans until five minutes before you leave. For most parents it is so that their kids don’t ask a million times, “when are we going?” but for Crohn’s parents, not telling your children in advance means you don’t have to risk letting them down if you are sick and plans need to be canceled last minute. 

I am not suggesting that you do this for every activity (to avoid having your children always think there will be a surprise activity) but day trips, amusement parks, or sporting events may be worth holding off until you are certain that you are ok to go before sharing the news with your children.

Have a back up plan for canceled plans

Let’s say you already told your kids that you are taking them to the latest bounce house arena followed by pizza and a movie but you wake up that morning and cannot stop running to the bathroom every 15 minutes so you know that the day you had planned is just not possible. What do you do? Go to Plan B.

Depending on how old your children are, you can tell them the truth that you are not feeling well or go with the common lie parents tell their kids—it’s closed. Bounce house arena—closed for cleaning. Movies—closed for cleaning. Restaurant— closed for a private party. You get it. 

Then, create a similar experience in your home that will replicate what you were supposed to do originally. Instead of going to the bounce house arena, have them built a fort from which they can watch a movie of their choice (even if it is a new, more expensive rental...just this once!) and have a pizza party either by making your own pizza or ordering from their favorite restaurant. Do your best to give them a fun day, even if you are not leaving home.

Kids enjoy simple plans

The good thing is kids find joy in the simplest things. So, if your original plan fails, or you have to make adjustments to what you were supposed to do, creating something new and fun will bring excitement and smiles, and then you can all enjoy the day.