The Scar

My stomach looks like I have been through a war. If you saw me walking down the beach, would say to yourself: Wow, what happened to that guy. I wrote in an earlier article that I would have fun with people and tell them an awesome story that I was surfing in the Pacific Ocean and I got bit by a shark. That sounded so much cooler than having eleven stomach surgeries because of complications due to Crohn’s.

Getting used to the scar

I really have become comfortable with my scar. For many years, I hated taking off my shirt at the pool, and being around my friends was hard as well. I know that I will never be able to have abs, and my belly button is slightly off centered, but hey, its better than having a fistula, correct?

I don’t have any feeling down the center of my scar. Because it is fake skin, it has no nerve endings. Also, no hair grows there, which can look weird at times. I can literally pinch my scar as hard as I can, and I don’t feel a thing. I will tell you that it makes a great show for my campers! Comon, you have to have some fun right?

I often think about the times before I had my surgeries. My stomach looked like everyone else’s, normal. But that was the hand I was dealt, so I learned to deal with it.

Scared that something is going to tear

My scar doesn’t really bother me much. Under my scar is metal mesh, that I can feel if I push on it. It is interesting. I can feel the sun beat down on the metal if I am laying on the beach. I always get the sense that something is going to tear inside. For that reason, I refuse to do any type of ab exercise. When playing basketball, I notice that my range of motion is limited because of the mesh beneath the scar. Before my surgeries I was able to jump higher and shoot three pointers. Now, I can’t jump as high, and literally have to push the ball out of my hands if I want to shoot a long distance shot. Wow, times have changed!

Scars can be itchy

My scar often itches. It’s weird, because like I stated earlier, I have no nerve endings. So I can’t feel that I am scratching it, and it doesn’t turn red. I asked my plastic surgeon one day what causes the itching. He stated that, “It is because the nerve endings around the scar tissue (not inside), are stimulated.” I would have more itching shortly after surgery as a sign of itching. He also said, “It could be in my head as well.”

My scar is me

I only had one issue with my scar. A stitch from one of the surgeries came loose. It actually started to poke through my skin, and I became worried that my fistula would reappear. I made an appointment with my surgeon, who saw it as not a big deal. Just to be safe, he put me under a “twilight” anesthesia, to complete the eight minute procedure. I awoke with nothing more than a dissolvable stitch and a band aid. My scar is who I am, my scar is… me.

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The InflammatoryBowelDisease.net team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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