Hope This Helps One Person
Last updated: August 2021
You look at me and you think I have it made. From my physical appearance, job and athletic accomplishments. Nobody knew the battle I was facing. (remember that, EVERYONE is facing a battle that you cannot see).
When I was training, I would have to plan my running and riding around public bathrooms. It got so bad that I couldn't even leave the house any more.
Here is another twist to the story. I am on blood thinning medication due to a pulmonary embolism a few years ago. So this condition wasn't just an inconvenience, it could literally kill me by bleeding to death.
It was a Sunday night and I was ready to call it quits..seriously. (wow that feels strange to say publicly). My wife called her good friend, who is a gastro, and begged him to see me the next morning. "He is suicidal, please help him!". The first thing the doctor said was "even with your blood thinners, this IS treatable and we will get this fixed".
The Mind-Body Connection
(This is my opinion): What I learned over the next few months was that my body was overloaded with stress. Ulcers are usually a result of a stress. Something was forcing me to address an issue I was facing. My body was saying, "hey, you better address this, or I will just find another place on your body to make it appear". For some of you that think the mind-body connection is some hippie religion, I ask you to consider why is that when you ask a pretty girl/boy for their phone number your heart beats faster? When your boss calls you in his office, do you immediately start to sweat? Does your heart race when you watch a scary movie? Your subconscious mind controls SO MUCH of your daily actions and it NEVER sleeps (even when you do). You better get a handle on it.
We all are using a brain that was programmed a million years ago. This programming tries to keep us alive. We are always in a fight or flight mode. We are running late for work and our "monkey brain" thinks this is life threatening..crazy right? You need to get control of your "monkey brain"...it will manifest itself in other ways. What helped me get through this period in my life, and to this day, is to keep a journal and create a daily affirmation. The daily journal is for me to write things down that are bothering me or I am worried about. This lets me address things I may not be realizing AND it lets me see things that I thought WERE an issue at the time, really weren't. I also created a daily affirmation that I play to myself every morning. I am reprogramming my subconscious mind (it can be done). I have it on my ipod so nobody else can hear me talking to myself.
This is what worked for me...hope it can help someone else get through what IS a temporary situation. Do NOT think that your situation is permanent.
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