Mommy of 3 Trying to Survive

I’m a 31 year old momma just trying to survive with Crohns. I was diagnosed in 2012 after a 2 month hospital stay. I’ve never been in remission fully and still awaiting a medicine that will help me. In 2014 after having my youngest I was also diagnosed with recurring abdominal hernias, when Monroe (my youngest) was one day old I underwent my first surgery to remove the hernia. Since then I’ve received 4 more. My next surgery is August 17th. I’m hoping and praying that this will be the last of them. Between the Crohns and hernias I’m in constant pain and it’s a battle everyday to even get out of bed. I want to be a good mom to my babies and better wife to my hard working guy. They all are very supportive but no one in my family understands the pain and daily struggles. Looking for fellow Crohnies to talk to and compare stories with in a small attempt to keep my sanity.

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Comments

View Comments (4)
  • 2 years ago

    Honey, don’t beat yourself up. You obviously are prone to hernias. I am too. I am trying to schedule my 6th surgery. Have suffered with this hernia for about 4-5 years. It’s gotten much worse in the last year. I’ve had Crohn’s for 37 years. Diagnosed at 16. Colitis since I was 4. Now 53. They told me I would never be able to sustain a pregnancy. Proved them wrong 3 times. Being a single mom of 3 is hard enough for a healthy super mom, but seems impossible for someone in our boat. The best thing you can do is figure out your limitations. Step outside the box. Then stand on your head. After all, your life is upside down. Figure out what you need to do to get the kids going for the day. Then figure out what you need to do to make that happen. You have to accept you need to rest a lot. And the hernias pop out because you picked up something you shouldn’t that was too heavy.
    Have you ever heard about “the spoons”? Can’t seem to get it in here. If you want to give me your email I can send it to you. It really helps not only you to understand it, but shows others how hard it is.
    The one thing I have found having Crohn’s and kids, just cause you’re stuck in bed feeling like crap doesn’t mean you can’t have the kids with you. They will love it and so will you!

  • Stephanie Huston moderator
    2 years ago

    Hello, saranoellehill!

    I hope your surgery went well and that you’re on a fast road to recovery. I first want to thank you so much for sharing your story with the community – you are not alone in your experience!

    I also wanted to show you just how much support you received from our community. Yesterday, the day of your surgery, we posted your story to our Facebook page and there was an outpouring of comments and support. In case you haven’t yet seen, here is the link: https://www.facebook.com/crohnsdiseasedotcom/posts/1024964594288379

    You are in all of our thoughts and we are all here if you need anything!

    Thank you so much for being such a strong part of the community!

    -Stephanie (InflammatoryBowelDisease.net Team Member)

  • 2 years ago

    Hi mommy of 3, first congratulations on your most important achievement, your children. I am a mom of a 33 year old mom of 2. She is healthy, so are the girls, but I have had crohns for 48 years. Diagnosed when I was 13, surgery for an ileostomy at 13, and 15 surgeries later I am fine and very active. I raised my daughter in between bouts of pain, diarrhea and surgeries. Don’t know how, but it worked. I still have daily struggles and no one really knows. But that’s ok. I understand your struggles and you must feel you are not doing a good job with your family, but you are doing the best you can. They love you, need you to get healthy, and want you to be with them for a long time. It is just that simple. Do what you have to do for yourself to get better, it will all work out. Kids understand a lot and like to be nurturing. My daughter did not miss out on anything, we were very close, and she has grown up with no regrets of missing anything. You will make it, and feel free to ask anything.

  • 2 years ago

    So true! You may not be a Donna Reid mom, but you are you and the role of mother is as individual as a snowflake. Bend the role to what you can do. Your kids don’t need homemade cookies nearly as much as your love and time. My 21 year old still comes and hangs out if he’s home from school and I don’t feel well

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