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IBD, diarrhea and dating?

  • By MiniLynnie8171

    I was dx’ed at 14 years old with Crohns disease. I am now 56 years old. I thought I was done dating when I got married at 35. It lasted 10 years. Now I find myself divorced. I am terrified to date.

    My Crohn’s was never extreme. I’ve had 3 resections that all put me into temporary remissions, this last one being the longest. Unfortunately, remission doesn’t mean no symptoms. I still fight with diarrhea all the time, and as I get older, it gets more difficult to ‘hold it’.

    My ex ‘seemed’ ok with the disease and what it means. But as I was aging, things got worse. I had ‘accidents’ many times that he helped me through. Even when we were intimate.

    But now I wear a ‘pull-up’ to bed quite often. Keeps the underwear clean! I don’t know how/when to explain my problems to a potential relationship. I’m very embarrassed about my gas, let alone the leakage I sometimes have.

    Has anyone been through this? What did you do or say to make it less embarrassing? I am at the point where I’d like to have a man in my life again, but too afraid to start looking again.

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  • By Meagan Heidelberg Moderator

    Hi MiniLynnie8171 –
    Thank you for commenting and being a part of our community. We appreciate you sharing with us! Hoping that some of our community members can chime in with personal experience, but in the meantime, here is an article that you may find helpful; https://inflammatoryboweldisease.net/living/3-things-learned-dating-ibd/.
    Also, another article that goes about dating a different way; https://inflammatoryboweldisease.net/living/online-dating-and-ibd/.

    Hoping that you find these articles helpful!
    Best – Meagan, InflammatoryBowelDisease.net Team Member

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