I Pooped Myself

I pooped myself.

Yes. I know we're not supposed to talk about poo because its dirty and forbidden but what better place to talk about it than here? It's a reality if you have a bowel disease that you are going to probably poo yourself at some stage.

Accidents are an unfortunate reality of Crohn's

Toilets are always just too far away when we need them the most. Heck, my husband has pooed himself after a 2km walk busting from the train station – a very long time ago but still funny as ever! And I quote, "I couldn't get the key in the door!" Hence, why he pooed himself. I was advised to mention that part!

Now if he teased me and made a joke about me pooing, I'd probably be in a ball crying and completely embarrassed but somehow his pooing is way funnier and grosser than mine!

Accidents are awful and scary

It's a horrible reality, isn't it? It's awful and incredibly scary! Especially as a teenager!

There were times as a teenager that I would be on my way home from school, I might have only been a few hundred meters from my door, but my bum and my anal strength just couldn't cope and I pooped myself. Okay, so this might have happened numerous times and I may have had to spend a lot of money over the years on new underwear...

Would I have talked about it or even admitted to it during the throes of my disease? Hell no!

I now have an ileostomy and have for 11 years now! 11 years of bliss.

My bum hole is no longer stinging on a daily basis from spending 90% of my time on the toilet. However... I still poop on myself all the time! Generally, it's during a bag change and completely NORMAL!

Now it's somehow different! Poo from my stoma is weirdly normal and not gross at all.

Ostomy leaks are no better

Just because I now have an ostomy hasn't made me immune from pooping myself. I've had leaks on planes, trains and even accidentally ripped off my bag when heavily pregnant! (I wear a 2 piece so only the bag came off.) I must mention I was being very forceful in getting my clothes off after a long day and it's never happened before this time!

Today I was changing my bag over my hand basin. Now, as I said before, I'm 11 years in so I can be a little bit cocky it seems. I was standing over my PJs thinking, "I've got this..." Silly, silly me.

Everything was going as planned and I was just about to put my base plate on when my tummy grumbled. I naively thought it might just be gas. Ummm, no. A poonami exploded out and all over my basin, me, and the clothes that I was standing on. Rookie mistake, but on fool me. Way to put me back in my place, Mr Stoma.

You are not alone

This disease can make you feel a lot of things, isolated, alone, embarrassed and ashamed. Usually all at once. It's kind like that.

Investments are important! Find a pair of panties and a small skirt (if you're a girl or a boy who likes wearing skirts) and wrap them tightly into a purse. Keep them with you at all times! Maybe even buy some shares in an underwear company for good luck?! :)