Online Dating and IBD
I was one of the lucky ones. I had been dating my (now) husband for a year before I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis. I knew early on that he was the one, but when he stuck with me through my crazy diagnosis process, there was no doubt in my mind.
Sadly, I know that my story is not everyone’s story. Not everyone is like Dave. Not everyone can handle being in a relationship with someone who has a chronic illness. I wish it weren’t the case, but it’s just the sad truth.
However, just because you may not have found your soulmate yet, doesn’t mean you won’t. Just because you are ill, doesn’t mean you can’t date or shouldn’t try. On the contrary, I would encourage everyone who has the desire to meet that special someone to put yourself out there and try.
Online dating with Crohn's or UC
So how do you go about finding someone when you’re trapped in the house? Two words: online dating! YES! I am serious and YES, it really works. In fact... that’s how I met Dave. Again, I was healthy when we met, but we met through an online dating service. I would even go so far as to say we are a perfect match.
Online dating helps to get to know someone
Before you poo-poo (no pun intended) the idea of an online dating service, please hear me out! While an online dating service doesn’t make dating any easier or more comfortable, it does give you more options and a less intimidating environment.
Dave and I emailed and talked on Skype for a month before we even met in person. I didn’t have to give him my address or phone number. This alone put my mind at ease big time.
Dave’s cousin (we’ll call him Luke for privacy purposes) is another great example of online dating. Luke was born with Spina Bifida. He has had more than his fair share of surgeries (30+) and doctor visits. Not to mention experimental treatments to give him a better life.
Luke is a nice enough guy. He’s worked hard all his life and had to struggle through health issues and school, but he has not one, but two Master’s Degrees and is currently holding a very prestigious job at a university.
Not only did Luke not let a birth defect get in the way of his goals, but he also didn’t let it get in the way of his dating life. Using the same online dating service that Dave and I found each other through, Luke was matched up with someone and is currently in a happy relationship.
There are many different dating sites
There are thousands, if not millions, of dating services out there. While they all cater to different preferences, these sites have one goal in mind: to match you up with someone who is looking for the same things.
There are even services out there designed specifically for those with disabilities or chronic illnesses.
Love can happen for someone with a chronic illness
So, if you’re feeling lonely and are wondering if love can happen to you, I’m here to tell you that it can. And my story and Luke’s story, aren’t the only successful ones out there. Sometimes you just have to know where to look!
What is your comfort level disclosing your IBD to your employer?