Pulling Yourself Out of the Lowest of Lows

By Julie Marie Palumbo

2 min read

It's hard to have a good day when every day seems like the worst. Experiencing repeated Crohn's or ulcerative colitis flares can take a toll on your mental health as it ravages your physical health. Everything feels overwhelming and even the smallest of movements can seem daunting.

I would often try to trick myself into feeling better, telling myself lies that this feeling is only brief. When the reality was that I could be sick for weeks.

However, I found there were some tactics that helped me get through those tough days, regardless of how long they seemed to last. Below is a list of mantras and techniques I practiced that helped get me survive my lowest days of IBD.

How I get through the worst days of my Crohn's

I make a list of all the small things I am grateful for, start with, "I am grateful for:"

Being in my own home with access to my own bathroom
Knowing that I am not feeling this way while in the middle of a 3-day hike
Being able to lay in bed if I am not feeling well
Having access to clean water and hot showers
Comfy clothes
Food delivery apps
Streaming services
The ability to eat (and name 3 safe foods and/or beverages)

Saying it out loud

I repeat the following mantras:

It is just a bad day, not a bad life.
This is only temporary and I will get through it.
Better days are ahead.
My disease does not define me.
I am strong. I am capable. I am fearless.

Thinking about better days

I would also close my eyes and meditate or focus on happy thoughts like:

The last time I felt healthy and how I felt mentally and physically
My favorite destination (any beach in warm weather, listening to the waves and reading a good book) – free from pain
My favorite scenes in movies that make me laugh
Quality time with my friends and family
The best, most delicious meal that I will enjoy as soon as I feel well

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Celebrating small wins with Crohn's and UC

It was always important for me to focus on the positive, regardless of how small that may be. Maybe the only thing that went well for you this morning was that you didn't run out of toilet paper, and that is OK! Celebrating little wins is important in order to get you through the dark tunnel when no light is in sight.

I know that it can seem like your world is closing in on you and that you will never feel happiness again, but that is not true. You will be happy and healthy again. And even if it is only brief, you know you can withstand the storm and make it through to the other side – again and again like the warrior that you are.

This article represents the opinions, thoughts, and experiences of the author; none of this content has been paid for by any advertiser. The InflammatoryBowelDisease.net team does not recommend or endorse any products or treatments discussed herein. Learn more about how we maintain editorial integrity here.

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Vern Laine Moderator & Contributor
<inline-mention username="Julie Marie Palumbo" user-id="2250416"/> Those are great and agree 100%. I am also grateful for the fact I work from home now so if I am not feeling well or need to lay down or just don't work, I can and I don't have to ask to go home, etc. Celebrating the small wins are huge when it comes to IBD I think for our mental state if not for anything else. Vern - IBD Team Member
CommunityMember7474c3 Member
 For me after some trouble with breakdowns often 6 months to a year after the worst of my symptoms were resolved. I was told I had PTSD, with unresolved grief and not allowing myself to FEEL the despair. Instead putting a show on for others for months, using my coping skills to give them a false impression of my true state. It was my pride and self reliance that took precedence. Over the years I have learned how often life with IBD will cause upsets, discouragements, and losses. The grief is real and needs to be acknowledged and dealt with in all its stages: disbelief, anger, compromise, sadness and acceptance. You are your strongest ally, in the most compassionate way. Depression Grief Tears Crohn's 
1. Julie Marie Palumbo Moderator & Contributor
 Thank you so much for sharing, <inline-mention username="CommunityMember7474c3" user-id="8788587"/> . I love your take on "you are your strongest ally" as that couldn't be more true, and without that strength we would all crumble. I would think many of us patients experience PTSD, but are unable to articulate it in such a beautiful and comprehensive way as you did. I hope you have more good days that bad, but even during your worst times, I hope you have several allies to support you. Carry on, Warrior. --Julie (Author/Team Member)
2. Richard Faust Community Admin
 Hi <inline-mention username="CommunityMember7474c3" user-id="8788587"/>. Thank you for writing and adding to the conversation. The grief that comes with a condition like Crohn's is very real and different in the sense that because it is a chronic condition there is the potential for multiple cycles and not so much closure. Our patient leader Amanda wrote here about the emotional impact, including grief: <a href='https://inflammatoryboweldisease.net/living/emotional-impact' target='_blank'>https://inflammatoryboweldisease.net/living/emotional-impact</a>. Wishing you the best and please know that people here understand. Richard (Team Member)
CommunityMember4177ad Member
I'm left on my own with no specialist my two children both have Chrons but I developed it much later in life then they have. And my specialist stopped practicing since she had also developed cancer of the bowels. My daughter was 25 years old when they removed 11 inches of intestine and my sister was 23 years old when she had her surgery. But now I have no one to even help me with my problem. It's worse in the morning and everytime I eat. I don't know what to do.
1. Richard Faust Community Admin
 Hi <inline-mention username="CommunityMember4177ad" user-id="8772592"/>. It can be especially hard to deal with losing a doctor, while having trouble controlling the IBD. Did your previous doctor recommend anyone new? Please don't hesitate to contact the office and ask. Our contributor Holland wrote here about dealing with losing a doctor and the need for a new one: <a href='https://inflammatoryboweldisease.net/living/losing-specialist' target='_blank'>https://inflammatoryboweldisease.net/living/losing-specialist</a>. Also, you may want to check with your GP for referrals. Please also know that you are not alone and people here understand. Best, Richard (Team Member)
2. Julie Marie Palumbo Moderator & Contributor
 I am so sorry to hear this <inline-mention username="CommunityMember4177ad" user-id="8772592"/> . I also had 11 inches of my bowel removed 10 years ago (I was 2😎 and while the recovery was difficult, it greatly improved my symptoms. How are your daughter and sister doing since their surgeries? It can be especially difficult feeling like you are going through all of this alone with no help. Have you reached out to a local chapter of your Crohn's and Colitis Foundation? They often have support groups and maybe there's someone else locally who understands what you are going through and can offer support or assistance. Have you asked your doctor's office for a referral to a new GI? Your primary care doctor may be able to refer you to a GI, as well. Please keep us updated on how you progress! Sending positive vibes your way. --Julie (Author/Team Member)
CommunityMember4177ad Member
My daughter is doing ok she has her treatment of Remicade. But my sister when she was told that it could come back in 5 years.started drinking and working in bars. And now at the age of 63 is a full fledged alcoholic. She just had surgery on an arm she had fell on while drunk. And is at my youngest sisters right now and I'm sure she is having a hard time I don't think my sister will let her drink very much if at all. None of us want to have her to visit as she doesn't want to leave anymore. Plus she will stay up all night to drink then want to sleep in the day time. Or starts drinking and knowing we can't let her drive like this. I feel bad for her but I'm having trouble looking after me and my cat. Thank God I have a roommate who loves walking and shopping. 
1. Julie Marie Palumbo Moderator & Contributor
 I am glad to hear your daughter is doing well <inline-mention username="CommunityMember4177ad" user-id="8772592"/> but so sorry to hear about your sister's condition. It's sad when you see the downward spiral that living with a chronic illness can cause. It's great you have a supportive roommate who can do fun things with you. Sometimes retail therapy is the best form of medicine 😀 --Julie (Team Member)