The sister with whom I have had the closest relationship since we were children recently told me, "you are just not as engaged anymore, and you need to know how that affects others...how it affects me, and my [adult] children." I tried to explain that yes, I understood that this is true. I am not as animated as I was prior to these 15 years of unrelenting illness and ongoing disappointments [from failed treatment programs, some which made me more ill]. I am so very fatigued all the time, my mind isn't as sharp, I am not as witty. She complained that I called her more when I was working full time [I was forced to take an early retirement due to poor health] and I paid better attention to her. All of that is true, but the conversation left me feeling, "well, golly, thanks for pointing out yet another loss in my life, as if I wasn't already aware that I am barely managing." I couldn't think of anything more to say. I tried to help her understand that it is hard to live with an invisible disability and truly, I was doing the best I can. She changed the subject - I think she realized she had pushed too hard, but when we ended the phone call, I thought of how many friends have chosen to end decades old friendships. They were ok with my illness at first, but as the years have gone on and my health remains poor, I have watched friends drift away. (Others, I should add, have been amazingly steadfast.) I guess my sister can't so easily do that, being family and all, but I have to admit, this conversation made me trust her less and want to engage with her less. The very opposite of what she wants. My energy is so limited. Any thoughts from my fellow IBDers?